BMW ///M – Now What Have You Gone and Done…?!

My brow is furrowed – it has been for the last 20 minutes. I’ve hurled myself into the day by watching a video and reading a report that highly alludes to the very-possible creation of a vehicle within the (once coveted) BMW *ahem*… ‘Motorsport’ M-Division that is swiftly morphing said furrowed-brow towards the realm of a small headache – The pig-ugly, unnecessarily massive and ridiculously unpractical X6M will soon be launched as an M-tweaked Diesel.

Nice try, Marketing guys...

Deary me. It was bad enough having to stomach the constant rumblings of a forthcoming M-badged 5-series Deisel (in the form of an ‘M550D’) but this news (and blured video – nice try BMW) just further tears away at the core of what the M-Division… er, used-to stand for.

Heck, let”s be honest – the downhill run for ///M began years ago…

They just don’t seem to understand that freely handing-out the M-badge amongst the eco Marketing hacks to stick onto the back of whatever bloated, jacked-up leviathan they deem worthy within the fleet line-up is ultimately damaging in the long run not only to (once coveted) ///M-ness, but the BMW brand itself. M is the beating heart of agile and precisional performance for BMW, not the Marketing Department’s plaything to assist in shifting units…

When the M-Division 'gets it' right - the outstanding 1M

In recent times they’ve been brilliant (BMW 1M) and they’ve also proven to be a bit silly (fake/synthesized engine sounds coming through the Hi-fi in the new bombastic M5) but lately they’ve been a bit pointlessly annoying (X5M and X6M) and now they’ve just become downright ridiculous…

I don’t give a rat’s b-hind how much inflated power and torque this new tri-turbo Diesel X6M unit will chuck out to assist in hurling this 2-tonne-plus mistake down the road… This is a vehicle aimed at ex-Club guy tossers, beauty-queen wives and the utterly confused. Point blank.

"An X6M tri-turbo Diesel... ?! Yeah baby, we're down wit dat..."

And you can’t swoon me with your new M3-based DTM racer either, BMW M – you have definitely lost your way… and ultimately, a life-long fan. Tsk tsk…

-Blake J.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: